Shame is a soul eating emotion. ― C.G. Jung
These days, I generally don’t pay much mind to the comings and goings in popular culture, as I have long conceded an inability to relate to it. With that being said, however, the recent social commentary on Miley Cyrus’ performance at the Video Music Awards has grabbed my attention.
Maybe it’s because I am the mother of a little girl or because I remember what it felt like to be female and twenty-something, but I’ve had a hard time making peace with the lambasting this young woman has received from the media and the masses. What leaves me shaken is the fervor with which we, as a society, have shamed and made mockery of a young person’s moment of poor judgement.
Below is a Ted Talk by Brené Brown, a woman who has done extensive research on the subjects of connection, shame, and vulnerability (please take the time to watch, it is a powerful presentation):
What strikes me about Ms. Brown’s research in context to this recent media free-for-all, is how antithetical our cultural behavior is to creating a world in which people feel worthy of love and acceptance; a world where young women don’t feel inclined to disempower themselves for the sake of inclusion and connection.
Maybe it is time we consider turning the Miley Cyrus commentary on ourselves. How might we use this moment to reflect on why we so fervently judge others when they make poor choices? Why do we have such a strong desire to shame people in the moments in which they are most vulnerable?
What might compassion look like in this moment? Can we cut people some slack (hold space for them) while they try to figure out who they are and find their place in this confusing world?
What do I want the Miley Cyruses of the world to know? I want them to know they are worthy of love and belonging, simply because they exist…and I will hold space for each one of them until such time that they know this to be true for themselves. Namaste Miley.
